Dear Last Year

I know that everybody and their dog is reflecting on the last 365 days as though its judgement day, and although when I look at the things people say they've achieved and are proud of in the last year I worry that I'm not doing enough. I want to be one of the people that make everyday count but often find myself spending too much time playing video games and worrying about what the future might hold.
But, I want to be more positive. 2017 hasn't been my best year yet, and 2018 might not be either, but at least I can try and make it bearable, maybe even likeable.


So,
Dear me, last New Years Eve.
You worry too much. You'll always worry too much.
The future is terrifying - you're stuck on a ball spinning millions of miles around in space and you're not sure what to wear to a night out.
Things aren't going to be easy - but try and grab every opportunity you can.
This year you will;
Go back to Amsterdam for your one year anniversary and it will be just as magical.
You'll travel to Tenerife for your 20th birthday, and sunburn your armpits. You'll spot geckos and swim and go to a water park. It'll be amazing.
You publish a short story in a Media showcase - which is INCREDIBLE.
You'll start this blog and have HUNDREDS of people read the work you wrote. You'll open up about your anxiety and people will be proud of you. Don't forget the feeling of someone telling you you're doing well at your dreams, you're helping people, and that they are proud of you. It's the best word in the world.
You'll write and publish an article, building your portfolio (and write another ready to be published in the new year)
You'll start Mario Super Odyssey and become HIGHLY addicted.
You'll drink too much vodka and too much tea, but you can go T-total after uni, right?
You'll finally start to feel happier in your body - you still want to lose weight, but you'll start noticing your body toning up and you know that you're almost there.
You'll go to physiotherapy and hate it - but at least you know how to start fixing your problems...when you remember to actually do your stretches.
You'll lose people and finally start to be not too bothered about it.
You'll connect to wonderful people and make incredible memories.
You'll FINALLY see Wicked in London
You'll see the Addams Family and be blown away
You'll see The Book of Mormon in London and it'll be the best day ever
You'll go to Chester Zoo - twice - and want to live there
You'll start medication - and it'll finally start working. You'll start to feel happier. Keep hold of those times.
You'll be shortlisted for a study abroad interview - which is petrifying but exhilarating.

You'll do so much more, but these are the things that will mean most to you. Sunflowers and swimming pools, toast and tea, new laptops and pretty cameras, happiness and memories with people you love.

Keep going for it, I'm rooting for you.